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| By Elan Lee and Shane Small |
Call the Kitten Disposal Unit
8.7 MILLION DOLLARS. I just want you to think about that. I'm going to write that out, so you can see just how many zeroes that actually is:$8,700,000
What would you do with 8.7 million dollars? Personally, the thought of having that much money instantly relieves me of any stress of where my son goes to college (anywhere but Roscoe's School of Gettin' Smart, PLEASE).
For designers Elan Lee and Shane Small, they used that money to team up with The Oatmeal artist Matthew Inman to release the #1 MOST-BACKED KICKSTARTER EVERRRR!!!! Don't believe me? Check it out for yourself! They put it right there on the box! So, with this amount of backers, this amount of funding, the game HAS to be good, right? I mean, Target carries this game! The only modern games they carry are the classics, like Pandemic and Carcassonne, or break out hits like King of Tokyo and Santorini, so this game has to be on that level, right? RIGHT?!?
I'll Take One Kitten, Hold the Explosion Please
Exploding Kittens is take that style card game where, on their turn, players play a card from their hands, follow the card's instructions, and end their turn by drawing the top card of the deck. If they get an Exploding Kitten Card, they're out of the game.
.
.
.
That's it. That's all there is to the game. Draw the wrong card, and you're done.
Hey, I get what they're trying to do. It's almost like a Russian Roulette style game, but after playing a few games of Exploding Kittens, I think I'd rather be Christopher Walken in Deer Hunter!
"But Mike Meeple, you're forgetting about all the effects of the other cards!"
You know what? You're right. There are other cards in the game, like cards that let you skip the part where you draw from the deck or cards that force other people to draw even more cards, increasing their chances of drawing that dreaded Exploding Kitten, but you know what? It still boils down to the same thing! Play a card, and hope to whichever deity you pray to that the next card you draw is not the Exploding Kitten.
"But Mike Meeple, what about the Defuse Cards? They let you stay in the game if you draw the Exploding Kitten!"
True. That they do. If you draw the Exploding Kitten and you have a Defuse Card, you don't lose, you simply discard your Defuse Card and place that Exploding Kitten back into the deck wherever you choose, but all this really does is prolong your suffering.
Eventually, the game will whittle down to only two players remaining, neither of them with any Defuse Cards, and the entire game will come down to who's luckier.
Hey, I get what they're trying to do. It's almost like a Russian Roulette style game, but after playing a few games of Exploding Kittens, I think I'd rather be Christopher Walken in Deer Hunter!
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| Hey, that looks pretty fun compared to Exploding Kittens... |
"But Mike Meeple, you're forgetting about all the effects of the other cards!"
You know what? You're right. There are other cards in the game, like cards that let you skip the part where you draw from the deck or cards that force other people to draw even more cards, increasing their chances of drawing that dreaded Exploding Kitten, but you know what? It still boils down to the same thing! Play a card, and hope to whichever deity you pray to that the next card you draw is not the Exploding Kitten.
"But Mike Meeple, what about the Defuse Cards? They let you stay in the game if you draw the Exploding Kitten!"
True. That they do. If you draw the Exploding Kitten and you have a Defuse Card, you don't lose, you simply discard your Defuse Card and place that Exploding Kitten back into the deck wherever you choose, but all this really does is prolong your suffering.
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| Now, THAT is truly terrifying... |
Eventually, the game will whittle down to only two players remaining, neither of them with any Defuse Cards, and the entire game will come down to who's luckier.
Explosive Diarrhea
Okay, so, needless to say, this game LOOKS fantastic. The art is great, and each card elicits a chuckle from me whenever I look at them. I mean, come on, TACOCAT telling me that he's a palindrome? That's hilarious!
But this game feels CHEAP. The card stock for this game feels like it's one step above a Dollar Tree deck of playing cards! A deck of Bicycle Playing Cards feels like there was more money put into it than this game. I honestly don't know what they spent 8.7 million dollars on! It sure wasn't the design of the game. It wasn't the production quality of the components. Maybe the box... Maybe? Maybe they needed some firewood and decided that freshly earned Kickstarter hundreds would do the trick... Yup... That's it...
Buy It!, Try It!, or Fly It!
Move over Ghostbusters! There's a new King of Crap! Exploding Kittens is the WORST GAME I HAVE EVER PLAYED. Actually, you know what, I take it back. This is the worst $20 I've ever spent. This isn't the worst game, because, I mean, it's PLAYABLE. Everything MAKES SENSE. But let's be real here. This is just Old Maid with some artwork by The Oatmeal. They try to dress it up, but there's as much fun to be had here as playing an ACTUAL game of Russian Roulette.
If this were some bargain game, sitting near the cash registers to trigger an impulse buy for like $5, I might be singing a different tune. But at the end of the day, most of us already own this game, and it didn't cost me $20. It's called Old Maid, or maybe we have a 10 year old deck of Uno somewhere. Either way, I'd rather play either of those before I ever touch Exploding Kittens ever again.
If this were some bargain game, sitting near the cash registers to trigger an impulse buy for like $5, I might be singing a different tune. But at the end of the day, most of us already own this game, and it didn't cost me $20. It's called Old Maid, or maybe we have a 10 year old deck of Uno somewhere. Either way, I'd rather play either of those before I ever touch Exploding Kittens ever again.
The Verdict...?
FLY IT!
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